Why Im Not Quitting

Has fear ever kept you from pursuing a path you felt strongly called to follow?

Been there. Done that. Not doing it again.

Here's the story...and the lessons learned.

That Was Then

Back in 2008, I enthusiastically started a yoga teacher training program. I'd fallen in love with the practice and the philosophies of yoga. The training was great, and I had few doubts that I'd found my calling.

*Our amazing Cityoga Yoga Teacher Training Class. That's me in the peach tank on the end.*

After the training ended, ... I didn't teach.

I was too afraid.

Afraid I'd fail, afraid someone would get hurt, afraid I didn't know enough, afraid of this and that.

I was mostly afraid of someone - anyone - seeing me or my teachings as WRONG.

On top of that, I didn't feel as though I fit in anywhere.

I was interested in yoga as much more than a physical practice. I didn't really care about someone obtaining a "yoga booty", didn't really care how flexible people became after practicing, and certainly didn't want to use or teach yoga as a replacement for cardiovascular exercise. However, I also didn't want to sit in a room with incense and candles and chant, "OM" for an hour. (Not that there's anything wrong with that.)

I wanted to practice and preach a yoga journey that was about body awareness, the poses and the flow in between them, but also about what was happening in your mind...and most importantly, what happened when you moved off of the yoga mat. I just wasn't quite sure how to do that.

Beneath the fear and uncertainty, the enthusiasm still flickered on. But it wasn't enough to get me out into the world. So I continued on with my own studies, my own practice, and let the teacher training become a tool for myself instead of something that led to a career.

And that was fine.

Rewind a few years.

That Was Way Back Then

Somewhere around 2002. I was super passionate about holistic wellness. (Notice a trend here?) I'd graduated from college with a degree in Psychology, minored in Human Sexuality, become fascinated with a variety of religious and spiritual traditions, and was looking for a way to bring it all together.

I fell in love with and took a Master's program at Prescott College, and created my own Master's Degree in Wellness Education. I took courses in a variety of religions, health studies, and environmental studies. I did 3 semesters - one shy of graduation because I decided to focus on the nearing birth of our first child (and travel to Arizona became tricky mid-pregnancy).

I'd been so excited to engage with the world around these topics. To teach them, to be a coach in wellness, to get others as enthused about this as I was.

Enter the fear and uncertainty.

What, exactly, was I going to do? How was I going to do it? What if I didn't know enough, and I was found out to be a fraud? What if I said or taught something and it was.... WRONG?

I had to learn more, study more. I wasn't ready to do whatever it was that I was going to do.

And that was fine.

Fast forward to today.

This Is Now

I've experienced such an unexpected swell of energy and inspiration around incorporating physical fitness into the BeingBreath way of living.

Mindfulness + creativity are still essential, but I found as though I've found the missing piece. A focus on coaching others to a full life that is present with What Is, that is that dance between acceptance and engaging in change, that recognizes the body and its well-being as part of this process? YES!!!

With enthusiasm swelling, guess who has come knocking at the door?

That fucking fear.

[If you are new to this blog, I do use such language from time-to-time. If you are offended, please just squint and imagine it says "fun duck wing", and giggle at the nonsense.]

I am afraid of people misunderstanding what I'm offering, program-wise, because of the "BeachBody" name.

It definitely has a connotation of working towards some bikini-ready body. (I cringe at typing that.) I'm afraid people will turn away because that's not what they are working towards (neither am I), because they see it as objectifying women (which it could be - though it is a different company, the controversy surrounding billboards in the UK underlines these beliefs - one view HERE, an opposing view HERE), or because of the structure of the program (coaches recruit other coaches and so on - I'll get into that in a minute) ... these views of "BeachBody" are not ones with which I align.

I am afraid of people misunderstanding WHY I am a coach through BeachBody (especially given the above).

I'm afraid that they think I've sold out. That I'm pushing the 21-Day Fix or Shakeology so that I can get commission, or that I'm slithering into a stealthy conversation so I can convert someone into a being a coach. This truly makes me want to cry when I think about this. I am opening myself to receiving commission, but I will NEVER sell out. (I'll get into why I'm doing this below - staying in fear mode right now.) If you've followed BeingBreath for any number of months, you know I would never do that. I'm afraid of shunning those who don't know that.

I am afraid - you guessed it - of being WRONG.

Art was easy (in this sense). There is no right and wrong with the creative process. If people believed there was, it was easy to dispel.

In my first week of promoting physical fitness, I've already had challenges to what I'm offering. I've had people share links to studies that indicate why any sugar (even the kind in Shakeology) is bad. I've had warnings given to me about certain exercises that I've been doing, and the health complications that they can create.

And those studies? Those people? They aren't wrong. At my core, I know that I'm not either...but if THEY aren't wrong, then the logic part of me claims that I must be.... (again, more on this below).

And I've debated quitting. I've already debated turning inwards towards my own practice, letting the pursuit of BeachBody coaching and indeed, wellness coaching as a whole, just float away, and returning solely to the mindfulness + creative pursuits of BeingBreath. I've debated returning to what is safe and comfortable and known.

And that would be fine.

Except this time, IT'S NOT.

I've played this game with fear before,
and I'm tired of losing.

Here's what this means:

1 - I'm not quitting.

Unless I have some internal change of reason to dislike BeachBody OR to feel that Wellness Coaching is not my path, I'm not letting the opinion of others - or this fear of being wrong - stand in my way.

2 - I'm sticking with being a BeachBody coach - but I'm doing it my own way.

I like the BeachBody products I've tried. They have WORKED for me. They've worked better - in a holistic sense - than anything else that I've tried.

I'm not going to be marketing the programs solely through the angle of losing weight. That may be a main selling point for some (and it could mean easier / more income for me), but it is not what I'm about - nor why I want to encourage others to try the products and programs. It is a potential consequence of the programs, yes. A positive consequence for most. But it is a slippery slope.

Weight is the pull of gravity on our mass. It's a number. It is a number that can be used in a beneficial way, or a purely informative way, or a detrimental way - and it is usually done in the latter.

Shakeology and the 21 Day Fix helped me find a will-power I never knew that I had.

They helped me discover (and adjust my stomach to) a more healthy portion size.
They helped me completely cut diet soda out of my diet.
They helped me get into a routine of working out 30 minutes every morning.
They helped me to curb my cravings for sweets, & cut out a huge amount of added sugars, without making me feel deprived. (I still like my chocolate...just in much lesser amounts).
They helped me to feel stronger.
They helped me to be more aware of my body, and of my posture as I move throughout the day.
They helped me to reawaken my passion for incorporating body + diet into well-being.
They helped me to be more mindful of what I was eating (fresher foods are far more enjoyable when eaten mindfully, and smaller portions encourage being more aware of each and every bite).

And yeah, they helped me lose some inches off of my hips and waist, some body fat, and some weight. (If you are really interested in how much, see this post.)

But that huge list that came before the weight-loss? THAT is why I want to promote these programs. THAT is what I want to help others to do.

The BeachBody path isn't for everyone, and I fully respect that.

I'm offering one path, one choice - and if it fits for you, I want to support you every step of the way in finding the strength and willpower that I did.

3 - I'm returning to Wellness (Coaching / Education).

Through BeingBreath, I've offered blog posts that provide inspiration. I've focused on connecting to you through my words, my photography, and my paintings. I've offered the Pause Spots, classes in art journaling, encaustic, mindful eating, and a full-blown unique course in mindful awareness in everyday life.

I will CONTINUE offering and ADD TO those offerings through this website.

But I am also driven to offer inspiration, motivation, and guidance on the incorporation of physical fitness into your lifestyle.

For now, this will take the form of blog posts, the Wellness Coaching Facebook Group

(Join for free at http://www.facebook.com/WellnessCoachLisaRWilson ),

and guidance through BeachBody programs.

(You can learn more about the programs and BeachBody by visiting
http://www.teambeachbody.com/lisarwilson ).

I am also enjoying chatting with those who are messaging and emailing me, exploring how all of this fits into their unique lifestyles. I'm happy to do the same with you.

I am going to practice what I preach.

I'm inviting you along to journey with me.

4 - I'm learning, but not letting what I DON'T know keep me from moving forward.

The fear of the unknown can keep any of us from moving forward. I've seen it again and again in the art community as people hesitate to share "beginning" or "amateur" work, fearing that it isn't good enough.

As I incorporate into my teachings a field that is much more based in science, there is good reason for me to be knowledgeable about what I'm discussing. Offering bad advice can be harmful. Pretending I know something that I don't (in order to make a sale or to avoid the fear of being "wrong") can be harmful.

I simply won't do it.

I am only going to offer guidance on what I know.

I will gladly say, "I don't know" when I don't.

I will make it my responsibility to research the answer when possible.

I will be building up my resources of where to send you in the case that I can't help.

I am continuing to work on my own education. On a recent drive with the family, I was in the passenger seat, brushing up on my anatomy.

(Want to know something randomly funny? I've had this book for so long that I had a receipt from Border's Bookstore (which closed years ago) as my bookmark.)

I've started a Khan Academy course on human anatomy and physiology. I've studied all of this at one time or another, but I want to remember and be as knowledgeable as possible. (I love being nerdy in this way. Seriously - after the kids go to bed, I'm learning about circulation and synapses.)

I continue my experiential learning through my daily workouts, the Shakeology (exploring how it is reacting with my physiology), and creative / mindfulness / meditation practices.

I am refreshing and adding to the years of education - in a classroom, through professional training, and through life experience - that I already have.

But I fully recognize: I am not, and will not be, a doctor. I am not, and will not be, a psychiatrist.

When I call myself a "wellness coach", it is with full transparency that I offer to inspire, motivate, and guide you on your physical, mental, and spiritual paths to holistic wellness. It is with equal transparency that I offer my own ignorance in certain areas, and offer to help only to the extent that I am able.

[Note: I feel the desire to add an aside here: I mentioned previously the others who have stepped forward to share articles, research, and advice that contradicts what I am offering - either individually or through BeachBody. I also mentioned that they are right - and I am right. How is this possible? Some choose to see science and the medical fields as black and white. I do not. Science, and in particular, the science of the body & mind, is an exploration of truth. An exploration implies an ongoing journey. What we "knew" to be true 100 years ago often isn't today, and what we are certain that we "know" today may or may not be 10 or 100 years from now. I take all scientific knowledge alongside this awareness.]

And there you have it.

If you are excited to journey with me, I offer plenty of ways to do so.

Join my (albeit sporadic) newsletter to be reminded if you forget to visit this site. (Click HERE)

Join the BeingBreath Facebook site. (Click HERE)

Join the Wellness Coaching Facebook site (Click HERE)

Join me in a free ab challenge (through which we'll be exploring our physical core...and a bit more), starting on June 15th. (Message me HERE so I can add you to the group.)

Join the 21 Day Fix Challenge Group, starting on June 29th. (Sign up for the 21 Day Fix program through HERE and Message me HERE so I can add you to our support group.)

Join me in any other fitness programs through BeachBody (Click HERE).

CONTACT ME with questions, inquires, or just for conversation about my path or yours. Let me know how I can motivate and / or help you.

And if this path isn't for you, that's OKAY. I'll still be blogging about, and offering my art, the Pause Spots, With This Breath cards, mindfulness tips and techniques, courses in creativity, and so much more.

And if all of THAT isn't for you either, I wish you well as we go our separate ways.

Here's to our journeys of becoming mindful, creative, fit, engaged with our lives, and to recognizing all of the tools that we already have within ourselves to aide us on our way....